THE SEX TIPS. Frank Francis lists down top three mistakes that most men think would turn a woman on
Quite often what men do that they think women like might actually just annoy the heck out of them. In fact, many of the articles and books out there telling men “how to drive her crazy in the bedroom” actually recommend some of the things that women find most irritating. Why does this happen? There are three possible answers:
- Women are completely unaware of what turns them on until a skilled lover actually does it to them.
- Women are embarrassed by the truth of what turns them on, thinking “I’m the only freak, I had better not tell the truth.”
- Women are reading the same magazine articles and figure it must be good advice, even if they feel like it wouldn’t really work on themselves. So, let’s get into it. What do men do in bed that they think is going to lead to orgasm, but most women actually find that annoying?
1. TRYING TOO HARD TO PLEASE HER
All you hear in women’s magazines is about how men are selfish lovers, or men don’t pay enough attention to a woman’s orgasm. It turns out that most women find that it is annoying when guys try that hard to please them. Questions like “Is it okay?” or “What do you want me to do next?” or “Did you come yet?” are better left out from the in-bed conversation. The problem with this behavior is that it is sort of weak and feminine. Women find it annoying when you are too concerned with their happiness that you seem to be too insecure to just let yourself experience the love making with them. It kills some of that sense of being swept up by a real man who knows what he wants and knows how to get it. On the other hand, what you really like to do to your woman in the bedroom might be the thing that turns her on. There’s an excellent chance she’s going to like it when you do those things, and even if she doesn’t, but because you are so free and open with your desires, it will encourage her to tell you, without being asked, exactly what she wants too. But more importantly, when she feels that you are doing the things that turn you on, when she feels the power of your lust and passion, which is the biggest turn-on for her.
2. USING A “CANNED TECHNIQUE”
Of course, at some point, you have to be able to learn something new and use it, or you’ll always be doing the same old thing over and over again. Here’s where the problem comes in: Too many guys read about some technique that’s “guaranteed to drive her crazy,” and they sit down and memorize the move. And then forget that all women are different. Just because it worked for the woman who wrote the article when her boyfriend did it, it does not mean it will be good for your woman as well. However, if you read about some sexual technique that’s supposed to be good for her, but as you’re reading it, you think, “damn! That sounds hot!” And you find that thinking about doing this technique turns you on … then absolutely go for it. Because then you are doing it for you, and at least one of you will enjoy it. She’ll feel that authenticity in your touch, and so, even if it doesn’t “work” on her, she’ll dig it anyway. If it does work on her too, then you’ve found a great new thing to add to your lives.
3. SPRINTING FOR THE FINISH LINE
Men are just brought up this way. When we feel like we’re close to completing the job, we give it that last bit of “go” to cross the finish line with a powerful burst of energy. We do that in everything from sports to a project for work, that last big push at the end. So when you feel like she’s close, there’s this powerful urge to push it a bit harder, a bit faster, and sprint across the finish line. Which, unfortunately, changes the rhythm and the intensity that was working, and prevents her from having an orgasm. Which is very, very annoying for any woman. Instead, when you find the intensity and rhythm that’s working, and she’s moaning and she’s getting closer and closer, just keep doing exactly what you’re doing. If you can maintain that rhythm just a little bit longer, she will have a deep and satisfying orgasm.
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